Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Politicians Stink at Comedy

  Politicians are not funny. I wish this was enough to stop them from trying to be funny, but sadly it is not. These people regularly fail at telling jokes and often end up offending others while doing themselves significant damage politically. Sometimes they simply tell poor jokes, other times they come across as racially insensitive and stupid. Sometimes they say something or do something because of a human failing and then claim it was a "joke".
Note: If you have to inform us that something you did or said in the past was a joke, you suck at jokes, stop it.
  Recently, the Mayor of East Haven Connecticut, Joseph Maturo, got himself in a little bit of hot water doing this. When asked what he would do for the Hispanic community in light of allegations of police discrimination against the Hispanic community he said, "I might have tacos" for dinner. Okay, first of all, that's not even funny to racists. I asked one. It's just bad politics and bad comedy all rolled into one. So in an attempt to be funny, this guy now is railed on as racially dense and it made his police situation worse. Seriously Joe Joe, stop trying to be funny (and you might want to steer clear of Mexican Restaurants for a while)!
  Herman Cain famously said before dropping out of the race for GOP nomination that, "I would bring a sense of humor to the White House. America's too uptight!"... Well Hermanator, you have to be funny first, and even then, we already have comedians for that. Keep your lame jokes to yourself.
  As we approach a November 2012, you will see and hear many more feeble attempts by candidates to be funny. I suppose one of the reasons they do it, is to get you to like them as "one of the guys" or as so many people said about George W. Bush, "as someone you could have a beer with". 
  These are both dumb ideas. I don't want "one of the guys" running the country, trying to fix the economy, speaking on my behalf with foreign heads of state or being commander-in-chief. 
  "One of the guys" responsibilities should be reserved for "wing-man", picking up the beer, or finding a designated driver.
Guys described in this way typically do really stupid things. As for the economy, "One of the guys", will probably "forget his wallet" again when you go out. I don't want him at the controls with our money. He'll be selling our plasma to buy a six-pack.
"One of the guys", might not shower in the morning. "One of the guys" is definitely "going commando" right now. "One of the guys" might pick a fight with someone just to prove his manliness (Iran here we come). You might find "one of the guys" peeing on a tree in your back yard...and your front yard... and probably your closet. "One of the guys" will definitely light a fart on fire. The list is endless..."One of the guys" should not be President of the United States.
  So candidates and other politicians, spare us your horrible sense of humor. We do not need you to be "one of the guys". Very few of you have the ability to really be funny, anyway.
Leave it to comedians, please! 

Below I give you some samples of comedic WINNERS and the LOSERS:


The former Mayor of Los Alamitos, Dean Grose, sent an e-mail "as a joke" that depicts the White House lawn planted with watermelons, under the title "No Easter egg hunt this year."
Classless and Stupid

Orange County, California, Republican party official Marilyn Davenport sort-of apologized for sending out a racist picture of President Obama depicting him as a chimp being held by his chimp parents: “I’m sorry if my email offended anyone. I simply found it amusing regarding the character of Obama and all the questions surrounding his origin of birth.”
More Classless and Even more stupid

Ronald Reagan definitely had some funny moments, but he also had a couple of bad ones.
This one may have been a bit of a mistake---but mostly Reagan got good reaction to jokes

Hilary Clinton and Joe Biden both have told horrible jokes, that are racially or culturally offensive
Joe Biden is virtual treasure trove of wacky and inappropriate stuff.

This was just poor... and who were the idiots laughing?

George W. Bush
As a matter of style, David Letterman pointed out how "W" had an odd joke telling style...

Also, as part of a bizarre comedy skit at the 2004 Radio & TV Correspondents' Association dinner, Bush showed a series of photos depicting him searching for those elusive WMD's in the White House. Probably not a wise on such a hot subject. 

Romney actually believes that he has the "gift of telling jokes". Really?
"He could never tell a joke. My mom was an aspiring actress and an English major ... so I picked up her gift of telling jokes and I love humor, which I get from her." - Mitt Romney 2005
This guy is so dull, he could combine forces with Al Gore to bore Al Qaeda into submission.

Really Mitt? Really?
John McCain made this joke about Chelsea Clinton at a Republican Dinner back in '98. It might be good to leave kids out of the equation, Big John.  This just makes you look like a jerk.
Why is Chelsea Clinton so ugly? Because her father is Janet Reno."
President Obama really blew it when he made this really dumb remark on the Tonight Show... WEAK
 ----Special Olympics joke and video


Abe Lincoln
"If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?"
Ronald Reagan
“I hope you’re all Republicans.” – Speaking to surgeons as he entered the operating room following a 1981 assassination attempt

"I don't want to be invited to the family hunting party." --on revelations that he and Dick Cheney are eighth cousins 

Gerald Ford
"I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators."


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